I don’t really have much to share.
I have made bread and cookies, cakes and casseroles,
sauces and many happy meals – but I didn’t take pictures.
Mainly because everything was eaten rather quickly- but also
because I am engulfed in a wave of depression that insists that
it isn’t that interesting and I don’t have the energy to fight it
right now. Depression comes in so many guises that it seems
I am always fighting on a different front.
But I am functional- can keep up with necessary activities- and
I want to honor the friendship that has been granted me by some
extraordinary people. So, Celia, my dear, this is for you!
In my kitchen…
is this lovely cookbook- a Mother’s Day gift from my son, Luke!
I have been devouring the pictures and recipes, dreaming about
making the recipes, and trying to get some of the necessary ingredients
stocked up so that I can make what I want when I have someone who
will help me eat it. My husband will not happily eat any of the meals
that I am thinking about!
In my kitchen…
is this bowl, depicting the wind blowing into the sails of a ship.
This bowl (or one like it) – has been in my family since my earliest memory.
The truth – this bowl has only been in my possession for the last 20 years, because I found it
in an antique shop after I had broken the original. I was so devastated when it broke that I
broke into tears and then hid it. I didn’t tell anyone until I found this one and then I confessed
to my mother and sisters of my clumsiness and shame. They were so wonderful and forgiving-
the bowl hadn’t meant nearly as much to them as it had to me- but everytime I look at this bowl
I not only remember the history of the original bowl- of family times cooking together- of it filled
with chicken soup with small dumplings (zsomervenka, in Slovak) of the wonder it inspired in a
little girl reading the story of a journey on its surface- BUT I also feel the love of my mother and sisters
and am reminded of the heritage of compassion and love that we share.
So that is what is in my kitchen this month- Love and hopefulness, and history and compassion.
Take a look at Celia’s blog for a list of other In My Kitchen posts- it is great fun to look into kitchens
across the world!
Thank you for summoning the energy to allow us a peek into your kitchen; I know how heavy it can feel to do anything when I’m low. I particularly liked your story about the bowl. I have watched a few treasured bits of crockery fall to their demise and felt sick over it too. How nice that a doppelgänger found you!
Thank you for reading and commenting.
It is the summoning of energy that makes all the difference, doesn’t it?
The story is there to be told- the bowl only needs to be photographed- but the will to share needs to be there in order to get it out into print.
I love you and your baking and your heart and your bowl and you!
Thanks, Elizabeth. The feeling is totally mutual.
This bowl has always seemed a little magical to me- it conjures up stories and soups, baked goods and memories! And lots of love… <3
Hello dearest Heidi, always lovely to hear from you whether here or another blog or FB. I love the tale of the bowl and the strength of family love and can almost imagine the steam rising from the chicken soup, the dumplings bobbing about, maybe a little chopped parsley on there too? I have Jerusalem and adapted a chicken dish in there on Sunday, the one with the Jerusalem artichokes, (which I don’t like) so I just made it without and served with roasted butternut squash and tomatoes. I even found some pink peppercorns in a mixed packet and carefully fished them out – not sure I could taste the difference in the end result, but it had a sort of pernickety pleasure to it. Hope and love and all best always to you xx Jo
Hi Joanna- I feel the same way about you – I love seeing your posts on FB and am enamored with your many subjects on your blog- I like a bread blog that invites you to explore the region, wildlife and backyard of the dear baker!
There may have been parsley- I don’t remember. My mother was a florist and worked in the greenhouse all year long- rushing in to make something for us to eat and then back out to transplant her seedlings.
Seven children and a business to run makes every thing a rush.
Your meal sounds good- I like the book so much right now for reading and drooling. Cooking will come later, I think. 🙂
So many of us battle depression and bravely go thru the days putting one foot in front of the others. I have my good days and my bad ones. Right now my bad days are highlighted by the fact that my 21-month old grandson lives with me and his little face just melts my heart. Hugs to all who need them. Keep your head up and a smile on your face!
Children make everything better- especially the children of your children, don’t they, Rhonda?
I have to remember that I’m not in a battle but a war. And it is just one day after another- when it eases up I always hope that it is over and I have won- until the next time.
Thanks for your encouragement and understanding. 🙂
Yes grandkids make it better 🙂 Although I’m glad I’m down to just 2 tonight instead of 4. House is a wee bit quieter. Lots of hugs & prayers for you Heidi.
Thank you for taking the time to do this darling, I know it was a struggle this month, but I’m SO happy to see your treasures. I still haven’t bought Jerusalem (but it’s on the list, I love the Ottolenghi books!) and your gorgeous bowl and the story behind are just the loveliest things. What a fabulous design of the North Wind (it must be the North Wind, right? I don’t think they talk much about the other winds :)). Much love to you.. xx
Celia- thank you for encouraging me to do this. I was looking around kind of half heartedly and thinking I didn’t really have anything to share- and then I caught sight of my bowl and remembered Luke’s gift.
No one can be uncheered with a gift and a favorite bowl.
Much love back at you!
Dear Heidi, I love you! I love your kitchen and the things you choose to share. Also, I love, the way you put stories together to go with whatever, you’ve chosen to share. You have one of the biggest hearts I know. You are special!
Thank you, Cynthia.
You are my biggest fan and dearest friend. And a very very special sister. I love the way you see me- if only I was the woman you see! 🙂
Dearest Heidi, I have been thinking of you lately and then read this post. Sending positive wishes and big hugs your way… and thank you for sharing the good things in your kitchen.
Thanks for the hugs and happy thoughts Lizzie!
Sometimes the IMK posts are so full of memories that there isn’t space for all the physical items in one’s kitchen.
Sorry you are feeling so low! Thanks for the peek into your kitchen, enjoy the recipe book 🙂
Hi Tandy- thanks so much for your good wishes- I love cookbooks written like this. They are filled with history, geography and romance and wonderful recipes. The novels with recipes at the end of a chapter just don’t compare!
Heidi how about we make Frank a cheese burger and some pumpkin pie and then you and I can make some of delectable vegetable dishes out of the book followed by some lemon meringue pie? What do you say? Is it a date?
Sending you a big hug from across the seas beautiful lady.
It’s a date, Brydie!
Thanks for the hug- and the smile at the thought of cooking with you my friend.
So sorry to feel you are not feeling like picking up the camera to share your food but your bowl is truly beautiful and I am glad it hold such wonderful memories for you. I have some plates that I bought in Edinburgh to remind me of my childhood in australia and they just trigger so much emotion to take them out but I am glad to have them. Best wishes and happy cooking!
I know what you mean, Joanna- I bought some cups and saucers in Glasgow that speak volumes to my heart.
I do try to catch the food in photographs, but sometimes I just can’t get the picture before it is gone!
Heidi I love to read your blogs and have always felt that your kitchen, as well as your home is a warm and welcoming place. I also have a copy of Jerusalem. It is my first cookbook as an app on the ipad. It is not quite the same as having the paper copy but hopefully I will get used to it. I vowed I would stop buying cookbooks as I have too many, but it is difficult to resist. I am yet to try any recipes but will let you know if I do.
Thank you Christine- that really makes me happy!
I have a friend who says we should cook through the cookbook together and bypass the husband critics altogether. I think she’s right and am planning on doing that this coming Fall.
Thanks for sharing Heidi, I too have trouble sometimes in thinking what I have cooked is worthwhile, it is blogs like yours that get me up and going again although I agree that sometimes that first step is rather elusive.
I truly understand how you feel about the bowl. I’ve done similar things in the past and not ‘fessed up till I’ve sorted the problem.
I hope the good times roll round for you soon. Depression is such a terrible thing.